Writing to everyone here from my hotel in rainy Miami!! 

 Took me over an hour and a half to get here from the airport, since I got here just in time for rush hour! 

Here’s to hoping the weather clears, or my beach getaway may turn into a museum getaway! 

Happy Long Weekend everyone!!

Perhaps I should have read my horoscope today before writing the post below.

Anticipating the answer might lead you to ask the wrong question.  Learn to be comfortable with not getting the knowledge you think you need right away.  The information will come at the right time. 

What shall it be today? Skeptical, doubtful, distrustful, suspicious?

I don’t have a particular affinity for any of those words. I’d, in fact, like to ban them from my existence. I don’t like their definition, their sound or their connotation. Above all, I really hate it when my mind wanders into the places those words occupy.

It is my nature to trust. I have an idealistic view of others…I tend to believe that most people operate with basically the same moral compass as I do. I have high expectations, and it is always a bitter disappointment when they are not met.

If it is, in fact, my nature to trust, then why does my mind wander into those dank, shadowy, unpleasant places where there is no trust? Why is it there now?

Why is it there now? Have I truly been given a reason, or has my uber-awareness distorted reality?

This remains to be seen.

I can tell.  I can tell because you were a little short with me this morning and now my feelings smart.  You know it just chaps my ass to not get a reply.  So what’s the big deal?  I hate being nosey, but I hate being left out, too.  So now I’m second guessing everything I said.  I wish you knew how much you make me pull my hair out.

Sometimes you just need some downtime.  No plans, no commitments.    Since I don’t have Mother’s Day to be concerned with, I took the liberty of doing that this weekend.  And I went the whole nine yards…sleeping (way!) in, not showering or dressing until the afternoon, with a nap in between.  The most productive things I managed over the whole two days were grocery shopping and washing the car.  Now, if only I was independently wealthy…

I’m playing along with this game from Julie’s blog. Leave a comment at the end if you’d like to join the fun!

1. Hot – A particular daydream I’ve been having. Sorry…guess that shows you right off where my mind’s at!
2. Heavy – How I’ve been feeling about my thighs lately.
3. Hopeless – The state of my love life the last several months. Might also apply to my thighs.
4. Hopeful – How things are looking now, all around.
5. Hungover – The morning of May 4, 2006…but boy, was it worth it…
6. Hot Stuff – You know who you are…
7. Headlong – This is a good description of how I have tended to enter into relationships…
8. Hesitant – A trait I’d do well to develop, particularly in regards to the above.
9. Hysterical – My laughter after a few drinks…
10. Heavenly – The two days I’m going to spend on the beach over Memorial Day…
    

I wonder about the wisdom of getting involved with you again, on any level.  After all the angst, all the energy I expended getting over you…accepting the fact that it wasn’t going to turn out the way I wanted.

Now, suddenly, here we are.  I don’t think either of us are sure how we got here.  But wow…what fun we’ve been having!  And the talks…how much I’ve enjoyed those.  I think we’ve shared more in the last couple of weeks than we did five months ago.  How’s that?

Part of me does wonder what we’re doing, where we’re going.  The rest of me just wants to enjoy the hell out of it, whatever it is.  It’s fun…and right now I’m taking that at face value.

Wondering if I’ve suddenly become boring or something.  No comments at all on my last five posts, and significantly fewer hits in general.  C’mon people…I can’t be THAT dull!

I got one this morning, all of a sudden.  The result was a booked Memorial Day trip to Miami.  I’m WAY overdue for some beach time, and I’m going to catch up!

Not packing much either:  towel, beach chair, sunscreen, book, camera.  One morning while I’m there I’m determined to get up early enough to see the sun rise over the beach…

Well I damn sure hope so. I usually don’t give a great deal of thought to matters such as these, and I usually don’t use my blog for political commentary…but I am severely creeped out over this.

As if even gathering all this information wasn’t bad enough, its already known that it will be shared with the NSA’s partners in crime over at the FBI and CIA. Soon enough these agencies won’t have to go to the trouble of obtaining a warrant to look at your phone records…they’ll just pull you up out of the database.

National security, my ass. Does the Bush administration actually think we’re going to believe that terrorists use everyday, run-of-the-mill landlines and wireless phones to conduct their business?? HELLO. The American people, as a whole, are not ignorant, and they are not going to tolerate NSA or anyone else running roughshod over the Fourth Amendment.

If you ask Gen. Michael Hayden, the president’s nominee for CIA directior, “Everything that NSA does is lawful and very carefully done.” Oh really. And they’re following the law according to...who??